Beginner’s Luck? Huck No! Mike’s Taking This Win All The Way To The White House

Wooohooo! Conservative Christian cuddlebug Mike Huckabee once again showed his uncanny ability to win meaningless straw polls by picking up his first insignificant victory of the season at this year’s Family Research Council Values Voter Summit. Huck, Huck Hooray!

The newly svelte but still God-fearing former Gov. of Arkansas racked up nearly 29 percent of the […]

Fox News' Fave Man-Child Glenn Beck Hits The Big TIME!

Oooooh, golden-haired angel of truth Glenn Beck has landed on the cover of TIME magazine!! Do you understand what this means people? It means the true patriots of America have won! But even more importantly, it means everything the man’s ever said is totally brilliant and 100 percent true.

Sure, the feature story is titled “Mad […]

Beam Me Up, Barry!

Well, well if it isn’t our Trekkie President testing out his light-sabering skills during a photo op on the White House lawn to promote Chicago’s bid to host the 2016 Olympic Games.

We can only assume Barry is breaking out his Jedi skills to really impress the International Olympic committee and help snag the games for […]

Super Sleuth Jimmy Carter Suspects Some People (Joe Wilson?) Hate Obama Just For Being Black!

Former President and soft-spoken peanut farmer Jimmy Carter is the lucky winner of this week’s state-the-obvious contest for his brilliant analysis of the motives behind South Carolina Rep. Joe “You lie” Wilson’s outburst last week during President Obama’s health care speech to Congress.

The Democratic statesman and peace-loving former world leader believes the actions of a […]

No-Name Bush Speechwriter’s "Tell-All" Magnum Opus Will Save Journalism!

Some speechwriter for George W. Bush you’ve never heard of named Matt Latimer who had the joy, no make that the privilege, to serve El Presidente numero 43 during the tail-end of his 8-year-term screwing America from behind, is giving the nation a much anticipated behind-the-scenes glimpse into the total disintegration of the Bush White […]

Mike Huckabee Suspects Journalism Is As Dead As His Career

What in the world could be in worse shape than the loose, flabby skin on the once morbidly obese body of Mike Huckabee? Why, it’s the sorry state of Journalism, of course!
Former rotund Arkansas GOP Governor-turned Fox News talk show host Mike Huckabee went on the last trustworthy news network on the planet to vent […]

Oh, What, Now Barry "Owns" Health Care, Too?

This guy owns everything! President Barack Obama went on some fancy shmancy television show called 60 Minutes to tell the world he believes that his health-care bill to murder grandma and ruin America will pass this year, and once it does, he will “own it.”

You see, President Obama understands that people (especially middle aged white […]

Rage, Racism, And Republicans: A Teabaggers’ Delight!

The usual right-wing parade of gun nuts, racists, white supremacists, Jesus freaks, Ayn Rand die-hards, and big government paranoids marched on Capitol Hill Saturday to protest the President’s evil health care reform plan to kill grandma and baby Trig, the government’s out-of-control spending, and all else that comes with having an illegal Kenyan Socialist Muslim […]

The Kindred Spirits Of Joe Wilson And Michele Bachmann

She’s baaaaaaaaaack! That other semi attractive but equally insane right wing darling not named Sarah Palin (but wishes she was), Minnesota hellwoman Rep. Michele Bachmann, is once again all fired up over the awful Democrats’ mistreatment of conservative kindred spirit and total sweetheart Joe “You Lie” Wilson.

Much like the undeserved suffering she endures as a […]

And The Runners-Up For The Republican Innapropriate Behavior Contest Are…

In all the excitement over Joe Wilson’s tremendous feat of making himself and his dear party look like a bunch of mindless heathens during the president’s speech to America, it is easy to forget the efforts of fellow conservative stars and statesmen Lindesy Graham and Eric Cantor who earned distinguished honors of their own for […]