Bad Santa’s Psycho Sleigh Ride To Hell

Ladies and Gentleman, consider this as a warning. If you’re going through a bitter divorce and a man who looks like your estranged husband barges into your family’s Christmas party dressed in a Santa suit and carrying a gun, get the hell out of there. Fast.

Because if his name is Bruce Jeffrey Pardo, his idea of ushering in the Christmas spirit involves donning a Santa costume and massacring his ex-wife’s family, including shooting the 8-year-old girl who answers the door in the face before indiscriminately peppering the remaining 25 partygoers with bullets as they frantically try to escape.

Oh and to really capture the Bruce Pardo Holiday spirit, don’t forget to top off your Christmas Eve bloodbath with a gift–like a nicely-wrapped, pressurized homemade device that sprays flammable liquid and easily incinerates houses of former loved ones.

And when it’s all said and done, feel free to ditch the Santa suit, drive 25 miles to your brother’s house and kill yourself with a single gunshot to the head.

Oh and Merry Christmas.

Bruce Jeffrey Pardo, May You Rot In Hell

Leave a Reply




You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>