Gasp! "Virginity-Pledging" Teens Gone Wild

Guess what?

A new study finds that teenagers who pledge to remain virgins until marriage are just as likely as to become raging sluts as those who do not promise to be pure and abstinent until they are properly wedded in the eyes of God and man.

But that’s not all. The same teenagers who took a “virginity pledge” were not only just as likely to engage in sinful premarital sex as those who didn’t, but were significantly less likely to use condoms and other forms of birth control than their hedonist, non-pledging counterparts.


So what does Janet Rosenbaum, the “rabble-rouser” and public health expert who authored the study have to say for herself?

“Taking a pledge doesn’t seem to make any difference at all in any sexual behavior. But it does seem to make a difference in condom use and other forms of birth control that is quite striking.”

Striking? Everyone knows abstinence-only sex education programs work perfectly well, condoms are evil rubber tubes of sin, STD’s are god’s way of punishing promiscuity, and unprotected sex does not lead to unwanted pregnancies.

It’s those damn storks gone wild. Why, what did you think happened to Bristol Palin?

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