Mitt Romney Must Have Confused 'Big Love' With 'Brotherly Love' Because He Somehow Ended Up In West Philadelphia

Innnnnn West Philadelphia, born and raised, on a playground is where I spent most of my days…

Hahaha, just playing, as the cool kids like to say these days. As if Willard “Mitt” Mittens Romney VIII would ever step a single freshly-shined shoe on one of those cement poor peoples’ slabs to bounce balls and play “sport” like some riff-raff who doesn’t even have a 401k or $250 million to burn trying to lose a presidential election.

Heavens no!

You see, all billionaire everyman Mittens Romney wanted to do was show some good, old fashioned compassion to a group of African American schoolchildren in West Philly and explain in very plain, easy-to-understand English that they are only poor and underprivileged because their mothers are horny sluts and their fathers are deadbeat criminals, and what kind of thanks did he get?

None, nada, zero, zilch, zip, diddly squat, that’s what!

From the Washington Post:

Seeking to broaden his appeal heading into the general election, Romney was venturing for his first time in this campaign into an impoverished black neighborhood to hear the concerns of local educators and community leaders. But here in the streets of West Philadelphia, the emotion surrounding his contest with the nation’s first black president was raw, as dozens of neighborhood residents shouted, “Get out, Romney, get out!”

Whoa, whoa, well easy there old fellow! This is not the kind of welcome His Highness Lord Mittens was expecting.  Manners, people! Do the words ‘finishing school’ not mean anything to anyone here!?

Romney arrived at Universal Bluford Charter School aboard his logo-emblazoned campaign bus and began his morning visit by meeting school and civic leaders at a formal roundtable session. “I come to learn, obviously, from people who are having experiences that are unique and instructive,” he said.

Sorry, MitBot 3000 does not compute ‘poor.’

It was one of Romney’s first ventures on the campaign trail into inner-city America after months of campaigning in the mostly suburban and rural areas that were the focus of the primary contest. Philadelphia is heavily Democratic turf, but education is more central political ground for the presumptive Republican nominee, and Pennsylvania is a key state in the general election against President Barack Obama.

West Philadelphia, notorious for its gang and crime problems and rampant poverty, is also home to the Universal Bluford Charter School, one of a network of schools in the city that target inner-city children. But the venue didn’t offer the friendliest of receptions for the presumptive GOP nominee.

Good gracious, why ever not?

Outside, meanwhile, some brick row houses across from the school were boarded up. Police had cordoned off a full city block to protect Romney and his entourage. Residents, some of them organized by Obama’s campaign, stood on their porches and gathered at a sidewalk corner to shout angrily at Romney. Some held signs saying, “We are the 99%.” One man’s placard trumpeted an often-referenced Romney gaffe: “I am not concerned about the very poor.”

Madaline G. Dunn, 78, who said she has lived here for 50 years and volunteers at the school, said she is “personally offended” that Romney would visit her neighborhood. “It’s not appreciated here,” she said. “It is absolutely denigrating for him to come in here and speak his garbage.”

But if one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, then Mitt’s mouth garbage should be worth at least twice as much as West and East Philadelphia combined.

Protesters assembled outside the building. Philadelphia police blocked off an entire city block during Romney’s visit, only a stone’s throw away from one of the city’s most dangerous corners, and stopped pedestrians who tried to stand on the corner. Residents of the neighborhood stopped to stare, some of whom who had never heard of Romney before.

Philadelphia Mayor Michael Nutter, a Democrat, held a press conference on the corner, bashing Romney’s record on education while he was governor of Massachusetts. “I don’t know why this guy’s here,” said Nutter. “[He] has suddenly somehow found West Philadelphia, somehow now wants to talk about education.”

Nutter, speaking in front of a 2012 Obama sign, pushed the message the Romney is out of touch with regular voters.

“It’s nice that he decided this late in his time to see what a city like Philadelphia is about. It’s May. The election’s in November,” Nutter said. “I’m not sure what he’s going to learn here today. I don’t know that a one-day experience in the heart of West Philadelphia is enough to get you ready to run the United States of America.”

Perhaps, good sir, but ’tis more than enough to get you ready to ruin the United States of America.

Or as they like to say in West Philly, when the Mitt hits the fan.

[image via Philip Rucker]

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