Perhaps This Is The Incentive The Dems Needed To Pass Health Care?

Robust, picturesque vision of health and tolerance, Rush Hudson Limbaugh III, may have dropped out of college after two semesters and one summer, but this high school graduate doesn’t need fancy degrees to know that “human beings will die earlier than normal” under President Obama’s “freedom killing, life threatening” health care reform plan, which, much like the fat man himself, should be immediately “aborted.”

Which is why Limbaugh, the Albert Einstein of wingnut radio, is taking his own dire warnings to heart (his large, overworked heart), telling a caller that if Obama’s evil health care plan passes, and all his worst fears are realized (besides a black man in the White House), he will leave the country. Can we get that in writing??

CALLER: If the health care bill passes, where would you go for health care yourself?

LIMBAUGH: I’ll just tell you this, if this passes and it’s five years from now and all that stuff gets implemented — I am leaving the country. I’ll go to Costa Rica.

But before you get too excited at the prospect of America’s worst human fleeing the country over its terrible slide towards socialized medicine to go terrorize the good people of Costa Rica and steal their highly-rated, GOVERNMENT funded, Socialist health care instead, remember Rush seldom says anything that is true, thus his chances of actually heading south (to live among the brown people he loves so much), are about as slim as he is fat.

Unless he was going on one of his famed drug runs to the Dominican Republic, that is.

CALLER: Yeah, you saw on the news where uh, Fidel says if you come to his country you need medical insurance now…

LIMBAUGH: Well I wouldn’t go there anyway but I mean the idea that errr, umm, errr, you’re gonna have to have health care, health insurance if you visit Cuber…

Ummmm, the real question is where the hell is Cuber? And do they also offer unlimited supplies of Viagra and various codones (Oxy, Hydro, etc…) on the cheap, no prescription needed?

If so, say hasta la vista to El Rushbo! Just think of all the money he’ll save from not having to fly back and forth, smuggling narcotics anymore.

Probably enough for a one-way ticket somewhere far away, without the oppressive horrors of socialized medicine, where they know how to properly treat their own, a place nice and exotic like Bikini Atoll or Turkmenistan.

Maybe then, those idiots in Washington will understand that Americans don’t want health care reform jammed down their throats, unless it is beer-battered and deep-fried first, and comes with a side of dipping sauce.

Peace Out, Bro!