New Totally Non-Racist Ohio Ad Kindly Asks Black People To Vote For Mitt Romney Because Abraham Lincoln Freed The Slaves, Duh!

Wassup black people? This one stock photo black guy with a booming voice and weird Mormon-ish look about him has a MAJOR REVELATION for you, black Americans living in Ohio.

Now take off your Beats by Dre Headphones and listen because this is important (unlike say, you people, in non-election years).

It is a BIG […]

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do, Except If You're Republican & Your Boyfriend Is A Cardboard Cutout Of Barack Obama

It is no secret that Republicans loooove to carry on fake conversations with inanimate objects pretending to be their #1 enemy Barack Hussein Obama. For one thing, they never talk back or flash a charming smile or even so much as a single cogent thought from their non-existent heads. Just the way Republicans […]

Christine O'Donnell Isn't A Witch, Just Like Richard Nixon Isn't A Crook, & Larry Craig Isn't A Man-Tail Scouring, Self-Hating Homo!

America’s #1 puritan, self-pleasure-free, meatball-gobbling witch Christine O’Donnell has emerged from her self-imposed exile to avoid further humiliation on national TV every time she opens her adorable, scholarly mouth, with a brand spanking new, first-ever general election ad.

And now that she’s rested, rejuvenated and perfected the ditzy substitute teacher with a steamy hot secret “I […]

No Country For Embittered Old Men

“America, Arizona we’re all struggling. I can’t think of a time in my life when we had bigger or more vital issues at stake than today.”

In fact, Gramps over here can’t remember very much of anything these days!

Ehhh, where was I? Ah, yes…

“The rebuilding of our economy, the security of our nation, our border, […]

“Complete The Danged Fence,” So John McCain Can Keep The Mexicans Out & Himself In The Senate

After losing whatever semblance of a sane mind still remained in the ol’ tank, due to a powerful combination of both the scorching desert heat and a horseback riding nutjob gunning for the old man’s senate seat, John McCain suddenly realized there’s really nowhere farther to fall once you’ve reached rock bottom.

Which can be so […]