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Civil Servant Barack Obama Announces Bush's Mission (Sort Of) Accomplished, While President Sarah Palin Accomplishes Twittering More Gibberish Nobody Understands

OMG, presidential teevee star and A-list celeb B. Hussein Obama is back on the boob tube and in America’s hearts and homes, making just the second Oval Office address of his presidency (which is one more than his appearances on The View!) to talk about some Very Important Subject (other than his sketchy origins), like […]

John Boehner Will Not Stand For Some Classless Knight, Former Beatles Included, Bashing His Hero George W. Bush; But Torturing Muslims Is A-Okay!

You know what really squeezes the juice right out of John Boehner’s sad orange face? Brings those tears splatterin’ big, fat ‘n hot right out his piercing baby blues?

No, not the distinguished former eight-year Republican President George W. Bush boastin’ ’bout torturin’ Muslims, hehe, while he was The Decider or how he would do it […]

True Men Don't Kill Coyotes, They Crush Hopes & Destroy Dreams

Yeehaw, Cowboy!

Gun totin’, fiercely heterosexual, 100% pure all beef patty of hunky manhood, Texas Governor, slick Rick Perry rarely feels what the rest of us non-laser-sighted pistol carrying losers call fear, deep within his chiseled, manly chest.

But there are times when even a rough ‘n tumble, real Texas man like Rick Perry feels […]

The Thinking Majority Give Tax Day Thanks, While The Other 5% Brew Tea & Carry Misspelled Signs

Except when in the process of getting teabagged, we presume??

But beyond that, turns out these loyal ‘baggers would also rather pay exorbitant Bush-era taxes and give the evil government more money, than get to keep their hard-earned money and have a black man to thank for their flusher-than-usual wallets.

Of course, to the other 95% […]