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The world’s widely beloved Arctic snow drifter, the most perfect specimen since Jesus Christ Himself, Sarah Louise Palin, lent her ingenuity and grace to this year’s Senate elections, endorsing several choice candidates, many of whom were spectacularly defeated, most by embarrassingly wide margins. In several instances, Sarah’s unwelcome and idiotic intrusion into the electoral landscape cost […] The country’s, no make that the world’s best Mother, Sarah Palin of the Snowy North, took a break from her grueling schedule updating very important status messages on her favoritest Facebook to give an interview to some lamestream media outlet, Zap2it, or something, to let the whole world know how proud she is of her […] “This is flippin’ fun! I’d rather be doing this than in some stuffy old political office. I’d rather be out here bein’ free!” — Sarah Palin, Mother Of All Grizzlies Everywhere Hear that America? Sarah Louise Barracuda Mama Grizzly Palin has big plans, BIG PLANS, to soon become President Empress of God’s America, because, well, […] Like any Mama Grizzly worth her weight in fat and fur, Sarah Palin doesn’t take too kindly to strangers, especially dumb librul ones, getting too close to her or her precious li’l cubs. And much like any vicious, aggressively defensive wild animal feeling the slightest bit threatened, any hapless intruder is met with a swift, […] Fearless defender of a pure white America free from gross brown people, and a woman’s right to cede control of her own reproductive organs to the evil, federal government, $arah Palin is on a one-woman mission from God. A divinely-inspired mission which includes a variety of personal incentives for the ‘Cuda, like seven-figure paydays, several doctored […] |
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