This Is One Bizarre Love Triangle We Could’ve Done Without

Umm, yeah, this is gonna be awkward. So I’m just gonna go ahead and save you the suspense: It’s his kid.

You already know pretty boy family man John Edwards was running around screwing some broad–er make that his mistress–while he ran for president of the world and his wife battled cancer. He’s just that kind of guy. So is it really that crazy to think that after endless romps in the sack, one of his li’l guys managed to squiggle in and implant itself in Rielle’s fertile womb?

Who knows. Maybe Rielle is sluttier than we thought and goes around banging more than rich, smug politicians from one of the Carolinas.

I, for one, am not going to pretend to be an expert on the sexual exploits of a certain Rielle Hunter, aka Lisa Jo Druck, Lisa Hunter, Lisa Jo Hunter, Rielle Jaya James Druck. All I know is her and Johnny were going at it for quite some time when Miss Hunter suddenly found herself preggers with an anonymous love child, sworn to secrecy and whisked away to sunny California.

Either way this ends, I have a feeling wifey Elizabeth isn’t going to be pleased. And something tells me John Edwards’ presidential aspirations aren’t getting any brighter. Not that they were so hot before this little faux pas.

I don’t know. Something about this southern gentleman and his $400 dollar hair cuts just never really felt right. Almost as if it were too good to be true.

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