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Dirty Harry to Outraged Republicans: Go Ahead, Make My Day!


For such a frail man, Senate Majority Leader and good-natured Mormon Harry “Mason” Reid sure manages to cause quite a stir. Especially when it comes to pissing off Republicans by saying things that are actually rooted in fact and reality and not just a figment of imagination from some teabagger’s twisted mind.

Instead of joining us on the right side of history, all the Republicans can come up with is this:, ‘slow down, stop everything, let’s start over.’ If you think you’ve heard these same excuses before, you’re right. When this country belatedly recognized the wrongs of slavery, there were those who dug in their heels and said, ‘Slow down, it’s too early, let’s wait, things aren’t bad enough.’

When women spoke up for the right to speak up, they wanted to vote, some insisted they simply, slow down, there will be a better day to do that, today isn’t quite right.

When this body was on the verge of guaranteeing equal civil rights to everyone regardless of the color of their skin, some senators resorted to the same filibuster threats we hear today.

Turns out Harry is one tough li’l Mormon. Not only will he not apologize for his comments likening Republicans’ attempts to kill health care reform to the same obstructive tactics used to prolong slavery and stall womens’ suffrage and civil rights, he doesn’t even believe the GOP is mad at all, calling the Republicans’ puffy, red-faced indignation nothing more than manufactured outrage not worth a second of his time.

It is hard to believe Senate Republicans are making these charges with a straight face.

For the past eight days they’ve done nothing but obstruct health care on the Senate floor and throughout this year have played politics with this and virtually every other issue of importance to the American people.

Today’s feigned outrage is nothing but a ploy to distract from the fact they have no plan to lower the cost of health care, stop insurance company abuses or protect Medicare.

And for those who are counting, Republicans have now held one press conference on manufactured anger and have issued one manual on how to grind the Senate to a halt but have held zero press conferences and issued zero plans on how to help Americans afford to live a healthy life.

How dare you suggest the Republicans care more about stopping NObama and the terrible Democrats in charge than providing affordable health insurance to all Americans?

Have they not proved their sincerity and dedication by calling Obama Hitler, waving Nazi signs, spreading death panel and dead grandma rumors, and circulating memos about the best way to grind the health care debate to a halt, with the extra bonus of impeding any and all progress just ’cause they like being bastards?

Of course, always dignified Republicans were naturally very upset over such meany words. From the esteemed Senate Majority Leader no less!

Sen. John Thune called the remarks “inflammatory and irresponsible,” Sen. Tom Coburn was “personally offended,” and Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison said there’s “no place for language like that.”

Has Harry no decency?

But then again I guess it’s not surprising coming from the party that duped the American people into electing a secret Muslim terrorist who may or may not be a natural born citizen of this great country as President of the United States of Socialism.

RNC Committee chairman Michael Steele said the comments were “absurd and offensive” and demanded an apology.

“This is inexcusable, deeply insulting and an arrogant abuse of the Democrat party’s unchecked power in Congress,” Steele said in a statement. He also called for Democrats to re-evaluate Reid’s “fitness to lead.”

Which is always convincing coming from the pinnacle of mental clarity and stability, off-the-hook cow-on-the-tracks, Michael Steele.

Sen. Saxby Chambliss (R-Ga) couldn’t agree more. “They are so desperate that it is unbelievable. And for Senator Reid to go out this morning and make such an outlandish statement like he made, just is another indication of the desperation that the Democrats are showing and the pressure that they’re feeling.”

It sure is! If there’s one thing the Republicans know for sure it is that everyone hates a party but loves a party pooper.

Or is it the other way around?

Hmmm, I guess such small details don’t matter when you’re totally irrelevant!

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