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Dick Cheney may finally have a heart, but you sure wouldn’t know it by listening to the man, the machine, the medical mutation known as former Vice President of Hell Dick Cheney.
He’s so excited about joining the rest of the human race in possessing an actual blood pumping organ made from muscle not […]
When not gobbling down Jersey Mike’s subs or helicoptering his hefty load from his Grand Canyon-sized couch to the nearest corrupt, corporate-sponsored, rich person’s bitchfest, New Jersey Gov. of Mass Chris Christie took a moment to warn the good people of AmeriCANT what happens when Uncle Sam meets La-Z-Boy. Other than a bunch of […]
Oh so that explains it.
Here’s Rick, err make that “Rooster” Santorum back when he was manager of his high school baseball team, presumably so he could smack hot, sweaty asses and shout “hit the showers” after every game.
And by the looks of it, the dude got even less pussy than we already suspected. Which pretty […]
Rick Santorum Shirtless: Keeping Kids Abstinent One Nipple At A Time
Rick Santorum took a break from his usual spewing nonsense about the dangers of rubbing unmarried loins together and letting silly women make important choices about their own deviant bodies to offend another oft-persecuted group of people, the scary foreign-tongued Mexicans.
Sure they may live in […]
Poor Mittens Romney. It’s trying to act like a human being, but it just doesn’t know how. Hell, the more it tries to act like an actual carbon-based, oxygen breathing entity, not futuristic cyborg Terminator Mormonator sent to terrorize humanity, the more we are all convinced it is in fact just a newer, more advanced, […]
Via Big Swinging Chicks:
Still irrelevent San Diego Chargers’ QB and Satan gangledopper, Philip Rivers, has apparently taken a break from his usual shrieking at opposing teams’ sidelines and fumbling key, game-clinching snaps to throw his (wobbly, slightly-retarded looking, likely intercepted) ball into a different kind of arena: the political one. But sadly for Mr. Rivers, […]
Right wing internet provocateur or as Alec Baldwin so eloquently put it, “festering boil on the anus of public discourse,” Andrew Breitbart, has died in Los Angeles at age 43 “of natural causes.”
Which for a conservative typically means asphyxiating on a ball-gag in full latex body suit while strapped to a wall in a dank, […]
Insane person and Slick Rick Santorum is once again all hot ‘n bothered, but this time it isn’t even because of hoity-toity elitist college educations, horny teenagers grinding their privates against one another like sweaty savages, the legally sanctioned Holocaust of the unborn, or secret Muslim terrorist presidents who don’t believe America is locked […]
I’m sure by now you’ve probably heard some vague rumblings about the mysterious substance surging through the nation, oozing its frothy, God-fearing, Santorum-y essence across the vast, toxic, anal sex-ridden, pagan and homosexual wasteland that is OBAMA’S United States.
But just who is this frumpy Jesus freak in a sweater vest spreading the gooey missionary (style) […]
When you think of crazed, Mexican-hating, wingnut Arizona sheriffs, normally the first thing that comes to mind is a crazed, gay, Mexican-hating, wingnut Arizona sheriff who hates his own hideous homo self even more than the terrible Mexicans he’s always shrieking about, that he actually tries to deport his gay Mexican lover for the terrible […]
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