Sarah Palin’s Foreign Policy Manifesto Via Facebook! Hint 2 NObama: “Less Bow, More Boom Boom Pow!”

Fresh off her keynote “speech” to wingnuts and white robe-wearing patriots at last week’s “Freedom Fest” in Virginia, world famous Arctic drifter and empress of the North Pole took to her favoritest Facebook to do what she does best: no, no, not bilk the public out of moose piles of money, silly! The other thing […]

Michael Steele Continues Trying His Very Hardest To Get Fired As America's Hottest Comedian & Coolest RNC Chairman...And Still Fails!

Oh Mikey, try as he might (and boy does he try!) to stop making his Grand Old Party look even more Grand Old Pathetic than it already is, there just doesn’t seem to be any way for Mr. off-the-hook Chairman of youth to avoid repeating the same mindblowingly stupid mistakes over and over again. Just […]

Gen. Stanley McChrystal Turns On The Real Enemies: The Lame, Non-War Loving Wimps In The White House

Oh no-zees! Did you hear the wild, earth-shattering news broken by that liberal elitist rag for hippie-dippie stoners and druggie rockstars, Rolling Stone?

No, no not what Lady Gaga wasn’t wearing under her latest hideous ensemble that fashion experts are calling some sort of “dress.”

The one about that psychotic commanding officer of all U.S. troops in Afghanistan, […]

Sarah Palin Wishes Barack Obama Would Love War Like A True American

Ugh, why can’t Barack Obama start loving war like a real American?

A rough ‘n tumble, real American, like Sarah Louise Palin, who understands America is only as strong as the number of civilians and non-combatants we kill with predator drones and unmanned aerial vehicles, preferably without either international or popular support.

Hello, this is America, home […]

Fun Facts: Special Literal Edition!

Ooooh, everybody loves fun facts! Literally. Everybody.

Did you know?

Beautiful blue-eyed bombshell Michele Bachmann is literally Nostradamus (with ovaries!) because she correctly predicted that Barack Obama is literally Hitler or at the very least, any one of the other notoriously evil monsters of humanity over the last oh, two centuries or so.

And also Obama is […]

GOP Tries New, Mature Approach: Biting Their Nose To Spite Their Face

Oops, Reality Must Have Caught Mitch Off Guard Again!

Wah Wah! No fair! She hit me first! He pulled my hair! Wah Wah!

Like everything else they handle so impressively well, the Republicans’ uncanny ability to face facts and accept defeat like mature, responsible adults elected by the people to represent the people, was in full effect […]

Meghan McCain Can’t Understand Why Hollywood Doesn’t See War as Playful Romp Through Gum Drop Forest

Meghan McCain is very upset. And this time, it’s not even ’cause of a bad hair day or ’cause everyone is talking about her bountiful breasts which she took a picture of and posted on Twitter because she loves America that much. Nope, not even close. This time it’s even worse: Hollywood.

Meggy just doesn’t understand […]

Obama Puts Peace Prize to Work With New Afghan War Plan–Exit Strategy Included!

While the American people spent endless nights tossing and turning, worried that President Obama’s “dithering” on Afghanistan would not only invite a second 9/11 but the end of civilization as we know it, Obama and military advisers were working hard to craft a feasible strategy that goes beyond Bush’s brilliant approach to war: “Bring ’em […]

Lou Dobbs & Bill O’Reilly Have Serious Policy Discussion On Whether Obama Is Indeed Satan

Slovenly, Mexican-hunting former CNN resident curmudgeon, Lou Dobbs went on Bill O’ Reilly’s fair and balanced show to assure the nervous public not to worry because ol’ Lou ain’t going nowhere. In fact, it’s time to get excited people, because Lou’s gonna be everywhere!

He and the ol’ wifey have […]

John Shadegg Knows We Should Never Surrender To Terrorists By Surrendering To Terrorists

Adorably unstable Arizona Rep. John Shadegg–whose awesome argument against health care reform was to drag infant baby “Maddie” onto the House floor to “explain” (in a deep man’s voice) why she no likey Obama’s doomsday health care plan to insure all Americans and offer free abortions for all the other babies not lucky enough to […]