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OMG, IT”S HERE!
The day we’ve all been waiting for, if only to never have to hear the words Mitt Romney or bayonets or “binders full of women” ever again. But mostly Mitt Romney.
ELECTION DAY!
So, alas, America, who will it be??
Will Mitt Romney win the hearts and minds of America by convincing them he […]
Increasingly irrelevant Sarah Palin’s increasingly desperate grifter tour quest for attention included a quick stop at a Texas Chick-fil-A to “support a great business”, munch on a deliciously diabetic, deep-fried chicken sandwich, and of course, to tell the terrible homosexuals “I hate you,” without saying, “homosexuals, I hate you.”
Ah yes, the perfect fast food for […]
Whoa Easy Now Fellow, Not Too Close!
West Virginia Senator and closet Democrat Joe “Just Like The Plumber” Manchin would like nothing more than to let the good people of his Mountain ‘n Mesothelioma-wracked home state know that despite that dastardly (D) after his name and the fact that he caucuses with the Senate’s […]
NOOOOOOOOO! NO, Supreme Court Justice Elena Kagan! Do not, I repeat, DO NOT go hunting with Antonin Scalia. Do not exchange the black robe for a camouflage vest. Do not lace up your hiking boots or sharpen your bowie knife. Do not load your double-barreled shotgun. And whatever you do, DO NOT get in unmarked, […]
There is nothing, I repeat, nothing Sen. Joe Lieberman enjoys more than crushing hopes and destroying dreams. Except maybe the occasional chance to kick a whimpering, defenseless puppy down the street or really stick it to Democrats, ya know, the party he joined in 1970 and represented as a vice presidential candidate in 2000, before […]
So the Tea Party & Occupy Wall Street movements are not that different? OMG, so true! Just take away the inability to formulate a coherent sentence, add the ability to still move your massive, diabetic body with your own two legs, not the reinforced rubber wheels of your Socialist Medicare motor scooter, toss in your […]
It’s Monday in America, meaning it’s a brand new week for the very mature adults in Congress to flitter about like special needs schoolchildren, while our nation teeters towards the brink of catastrophic self-induced collapse.
Hooray!?
Of course, being the mature, weeping, unnaturally orange-tinted Republican House Speaker that he is, John Boehner has naturally decided to stop […]
Another day, another pathetic, sadsack politician feeling the heat because he couldn’t keep it in his pants, or in this case, off Andrew Breitbart’s pervy iPhone.
And this time, the no-longer-contained-in-boxer-briefs weiner in question belongs to none other than aptly named New York congressman Anthony Weiner, who apparently managed to put his wonderful, web-cruising weiner in […]
Democrats and Republicans might be on the verge of shutting down the big, bad gubmint (hooray?) due to some alleged financial dispute, but beloved members of both of our nation’s dumb political parties can at least still agree on one thing: even House Speaker John Boehner’s inappropriate, borderline hysterical booze tears won’t be enough […]
Screw the Middle East, bro, have you seen the crazy shit that’s goin’ down in the Middle West?
All 14 of Wisconsin’s Democratic Senators have fled the state (9-month long winters and this is what it took?) to prevent union-busting, budget-crazed Republicans from voting stripping public employees of their longstanding collective bargaining rights, and basically transforming […]
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