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Notorious New York hell monster Carl Paladino enjoys indulging in a few of life’s simpler pleasures: sending mindblowingly offensive, racist emails about Barry NObama (lol, negro president!), hot girl-on-horse porno videos, beating up no-good, prying reporters askin’ too many questions (maybe after he’s governor, he’ll answer your stinkin’ questions!), and saying whatever terrible, vulgar, repulsive […] Angry, unstable, menthol-infused conservative wingnut Sen. Jim DeMint is quite disappointed, no make that terribly offended, that “no one” publicly came to his defense back in 2004, when he first expressed his wonderful, reasonable belief that hideous gay people and loose, unmarried sluts should be banned from teaching, even if “everyone” secretly whispered sweet nothings […] Hooray! The radical GAY Nazi student cabal wins again! Deviant homosexuals across the nation have earned the right to openly serve as college student body presidents without constant harassment by some creepy, nutjob Assistant Attorney General who has an unhealthy, not-in-the-least-bit suspicious obsession with an 18-year-old University of Michigan freshman all for having the sheer […] Say you’re a confused gay or lesbian patriot who hates taxes almost as much as terrible, no-good moral fabric-destroying minorities such as your own deviant homosexual self. Now pretend, there’s actually a whole group of fellow self-loathing wingnut queers (let’s call them GOProud, shall we?) who just like you and Patty Hearst, can’t help but align […] Like any other decent white patriot worth their weight in teabags and KFC Double Downs, you too probably spent your weekend basking in the sweet (segregated) glory of the GOP’s new Pledge to America, the biggest, brightest, most gamechangingest idea yet to get that no-good Blacky NObama out of the White House and back where […] Rejoice America! Because yesterday, while Senate Republicans — some of the most sexually open, secure people in the entire world — were patriotically filibustering the very idea of debating the possibility of maybe repealing Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, giving terrible gays and lezzies the right to die for their country, the Grand Obstructionist Party were […] OMG! Guess what little gay and lezzy monsters across America?? Your little “rights” struggles are over! Done, dunzo, finito, Ga-Ga-gonzo! Oh, wait never mind, you’re all still totally screwed, despite Lady Gaga donning a hotttt meat dress, and p-p-p-poking her face all around Maine, trying to convince the last two “moderate” (aka not completely insane) Senator […] Congratulations, nation! A new poll finds that a majority of Americans now think same-sex couples with children and married gays without kids (or the blessings of the Lord?) should count as “a family.” Not everyone, though! Not everyone is convinced that a committed relationship between two men or two women (gasp!) is as God-blessed, pure, and […] |
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